Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Being Sick, Loving the Children of South Africa, and Mozambique Tomorrow!
Loved ones!
Wow, I am so excited to be connecting with you all! As most of you probably have heard I have made it safely to South Africa. I have been here for 10 days. Unfortunately, for 5 of those 10 days I was horribly sick and couldn't get out of bed. I just started feeling better two days ago. It turns out that I had a sinus infection that went untreated and eventually spread and got pretty bad. BUT thank God for the kindness of you people who are reading this and have sent me donations this month I was able to go the hospital and afford all of my prescriptions. I am currently on 5 different medicines. Thank you thank you thank you all sooooooo much for supporting me. If felt so good to know that even though a crisis occurred I didnt need to worry because I am not alone. I have amazing people like YOU backing me and praying for me and supporting me and checking on me. It was such an amazing feeling! Thank you so much!
So obviously I dont have many things to update you on yet because I have been in bed sick this whole trip so far lol, but there are some highlights! Firstly, I spent 2 days in Johannesburg visiting great friends which I havent seen for years! It was really great!I then came to Cape Town and have been here for 7 days. On Saturday I was given the great pleasure of doing a drama workshop for an NGO here called Resilient Kids. This was absolutely amazing. I had forgotten why I love doing theatre with children in South Africa so much. These kids were actually teenagers so I got to get into more deep and challenging things with them. The theme of the workshop was "dreams" and it focused on awakening the dreams that God has placed in their hearts. At the end I broke them into 2 groups and they each made about 5 min long skits about their dreams. They were sooooo good. What talented young people!!! My heart hasnt been moved like that in a while. As I was watching them I was praying to God telling Him that if this is all I did with my life i'd be satisfied. It felt to good to love those kids by giving them a platform to tell their stories. However, as is normal with doing this kind of work with children who live in poverty in Africa, it was hard to watch their skits because they were so full of trauma. They were filled with rape, violence, sadness and crushed dreams. But this is their reality, and they must be given a safe place to share their stories. However, each skit ended with hope and with Gods light so that made me really happy.
Tomorrow I leave for Mozambique!!!! I will be spending 2 and a half months in a missionary training school there. Super excited! In fact I have to get ready to leave for the airport in just a matter of hours and I havent even gotten any sleep yet. But I wanted to go ahead and give you all a glimpse into how im doing because I wont have internet access there often so may not be able to blog again until mid August.
SO just wanted to let you all know that im feeling MUCH better. Thanks so so much for all the prayers. Im beyond excited about leaving for Mozambique tomorrow and spending 2 and a half months of seeking my Jesus. Again, I love you all soooooooo much and will blog about all the amazing experiences Papa God and I have in Mozambique when I return!!
Monday, April 30, 2012
Testimony of His GOODness
Three weeks, three weeks threeeeeeeeeee weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeks!!!!!!!! Ah, I am SO EXCITED! Wow, guys you have no idea how intense this journey of hoping, believing, praying, and trusting has been for me. And now that it’s almost done, the fun is about to begin. Yay yay yay!!!!!! So when I last blogged I was basically “blogging by faith”… if that’s a term haha. I knew what I was being called to, but had no idea where the money would come from. But then it dawned on me: heaven! Friends, these past 6 weeks have been nothing short of miraculous! God has used this time to let the truth of wh12o He is drop from my head to my heart, and not only who He is, but more specifically who He is to ME. The biggest revelation of His character I have received is the meaning of the popular saying “God is good”. I’ve said that for years. I’m sure most of you have too. But what does that even mean? In the churches I grew up in the pastor would say “God is good” and then congregation would reply “all the time”. It was a mantra that we learned and said without ever really stopping to think about what it means. It never evoked any kind of emotion nor did it even make me think about God at all. It was basically just a way of saying good morning or greeting the crowd.
Well, I have news for any of you who are like me and never have had a revelation of what that phrase means. God is good. He is a good Daddy, an amazing Father that is insanely and passionately in love with us and wants to give us good gifts because He likes to see us smile. He is everything good. Nothing bad ever comes from Him. He is only good. He is not a neutral God. He is a good God. Even when I am bad, He is good. When I do bad things, think bad thoughts, say bad words, don’t obey him, don’t trust him, don’t believe him, He is still good and He still loves me. When I say good I mean merciful, gracious, forgiving, fun, faithful, truthful, loving, compassionate, creative, generous, patient, protective, kind, funny, wise. He is the good Father who will not give His children a stone if they ask for bread. In fact, He is the good Father that will not only give you the bread you ask for but butter and jam as well. How do I know this? Because I asked Him for bread afraid of receiving a stone, but trusting His goodness, and He gave me warm bread with melted butter and strawberry jam which is my absolute favorite! And He even gave me a nice cup of tea to wash it down. Hahaha He’s sooooo good!!!
So for the sake of not making this blog a novel I will just tell you about the amazing financial provision the Lord has showered down on me over the past 6 weeks and share a couple testimonies. My favorite testimony happened last week. About 3 weeks prior I got a letter in the mail from a pastor in New York saying that she had heard me preaching at my dad’s church a couple of weeks prior when she was in Georgia and felt compelled to have her church give toward my mission. I’ve never met this woman. I have never even spoken to her. I don’t even have any idea what she looks like. The next weekend was Easter and she called my dad saying that she took up an offering for me on Good Friday and it was $1,000! She said she would take up another offering on Easter and then send me the check. I was totally undone! Amazed by God! I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. My tuition for my missions school (Iris Ministries Harvest School) was due a couple weeks later and I was exactly $1,000 short so I was overjoyed because this money would pay off my tuition. But the days kept going by and I didn’t receive the check. Then weeks went by and I still didn’t receive it. Next thing I knew it was Tuesday April 24th, the day before the tuition was due. I had been praying and believing for the check to come in time and I was a mess because I knew that if it didn’t come on that day I wouldn’t be able to pay my tuition and possibly not be able to attend the missions school because of it. I was so worried that I could barely eat. But I was praying and trusting God for a miracle, that on Tuesday the check would miraculously come. So I woke up Tues morning and began to pray and declare Gods promises over me and then I just went into a time of worship. As I worshipped worry went away and faith rose up. Then as I was praying in the spirit I saw a check (in the spirit) and it was stuck between heaven and Earth. I know that sounds crazy to some of you haha, sorry. Then I remembered a word that a friend had given me a few nights prior. She had raised over $14,000 for her missions. She told me that she has an angel that takes money from her heavenly bank account and brings it down to her earthly bank account. Then she told me that she was giving the angel to me and she commanded the angel to take everything I need from my heavenly bank account and bring it down to my earthly one. So when I saw that check between heaven and earth I got so excited! I commanded my new angel to bring it down to earth and I started shaking doing a prophetic gesture of using my hands to shake the check from heaven to earth. When I opened my eyes I felt pretty ridiculous hahaha and was happy that no one had seen what I had just did. At the time I hadn’t planned on embarrassing myself by sharing this story on my blog hahaha. Anyway, I picked up my phone and texted my Dad. The text said “I spent the morning with God and I feel His encouragement. He’s giving me grace to believe that the check will come today because He’s good and He loves me and He wants me to go to this school so I can be prepared to mother these children in Cameroon”. About thirty seconds later my dad called me back and excitedly said “I just checked the mail and guess what was in there!” “What!!!” I said. “ A check for you for $1,548” he said. HE IS SO GOOD!!!!!!
There are lots more miracles I can tell you about, but I wont because this blog is already very long. But just so you can get an idea, over the past 6 weeks God has provided: my missions school tuition ($2,600), my ticket to South Africa (usually about $1,800), my ticket to Mozambique ($900), my ticket to Cameroon ($913), all my immunizations ($330), my visa app fee for Mozambique ($70), my tent and sleeping bag (gifts from my uncles). I am so very grateful and amazed at His GOODness!! I am such a beloved daughter of such a kind King!!!!!!!!!!!
I realize that these miracles happened because YOU my amazing friends, family and supporters were willing to be used by God to make my dreams come true. Thank you! Those two little words never seem sufficient to express my gratitude. But I hope that you know how deeply grateful I am. I always pray that our Father will bless you beyond your wildest dreams in return for your kindness to me.
My itinerary looks like this. I leave for South Africa on May 21st. I will spend 10 days there spending time with loved ones there whom I haven’t seen in almost a year! So excited to see Mpho, Joshua, all my friends, my children from Art for Africa, and everyone else! Its going to be so amazing. Then on May 31st I take my last warm shower and leave for Pemba, Mozambique to get totally rocked by God and learn about what love looks like and what it really means to throw your life away to Jesus and let Him use it to serve the poor, the broken, the dying, the lost, and the forgotten. I will be there for two and a half months. After that I will go back to South Africa for 3 more weeks to rest, spend time with my people again, and do a drama and arts workshop for some children with The Fathers Heart church and Kay Lorenz. On Sept 4th I leave for Cameroon where I will be serving in an orphanage and giving my life to loving the children there and by Gods grace raising them up in love for the Lord.
I look forward to sharing this journey with you! As my departure date quickly approaches I have some needs that still need to be met. Please let me know if you can help me in any way.
PRAYER-
• God to bring me spiritual mothers and fathers in Cameroon as well as sisters and brothers so that I have a spiritual family although I won’t be going to a traditional church every Sunday
• God to bring me people who are willing to support me monthly while I am working in Cameroon (I’m praying for $400 per month in support)
• God to teach me how to mother these children well, and cause me to continue to grow in love for them as I grow in love for Him
• God to provide money for my visa for Cameroon ($150) and the other financial obligations I need to meet in the next 3 weeks
• For His perfect love to cast all out fear in me and that I will go to Cameroon with boldness and joy and confidence
• Humility, humility, humility
• Love for Him and more love for Him
• Revelation and wisdom
PHYSICAL NEEDS-
• Pair of long shorts for the beach
• Insect repellent
• Small notebook computer
• Malaria medicine
FINANCIAL NEEDS-
• Monthly support. Every small amount helps
• Visa application fee for Cameroon ($146)
• Medical Insurance fee ($150)
• Money to have in my bank account when I leave for living expenses and in case of emergency
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Details, Details, Details!
Hello beautiful people!
Finally I have some time to sit down and blog about this whole moving back to Africa business! Lots of you have been asking me questions. Well, here are all the answers :)
First of all I just want to say a huge THANK YOU SO MUCH to everyone who has been praying for me, helping me with my fundraising, encouraging me, making financial contributions etc. You are so loved and so appreciated! I am such a blessed little woman who loves Jesus :)
So the first step of my next African adventure deeper into Gods heart of love will begin in Pemba, Mozambique. I will be attending a school for missionaries there called Harvest School which is run by Iris Ministries. Here is a little info about what it is from our student manual:
"Harvest school is a school for those who have a clear call to missions. All giftings are welcome and it is definitely not just open for pastors or leaders. It a school to train and equip a new breed of missionaries, a generation of laid down lovers who will run into the darkest corners of the earth, call in the outcasts, bring in His bride and compel the poor to come to the wedding feast.
You can see Jesus in the eyes of the dying, the broken and the lost. He came with ceaseless love for both the one and the masses. Now we must do the same- stop for the one but believe for the multitudes. We are called to carry His glory, but first we must lie down so that whole nations can come to Jesus.
For this purpose, Iris Ministries it thrilled to present our international missions training schools based in the northern province of Mozambique. To come and be trained on the field. Live, love, and learn from the poor."
I am overcome with excitement about the school!! It goes from June 1st- August 9th. I know that it’s going to be such a precious time for me and the Lord. I am praying that He just fills me with more and more of His love for Him which looks like more and more love for my neighbor (my poor neighbor, my unlovely neighbor, my mean neighbor, my sister/neighbor, my mother/father/neighbor, my hungry neighbor, my neighbor who lives on a different continent etc) and then when I leave the school I can just pour all that love He’s given me out on each person I come into contact with, especially the children I will be serving in Cameroon.
That brings us to step two of my journey. After completing the school I will be moving to Cameroon to live a dream God has been burning my heart with for quite a while now. I will be living and working and loving in an orphanage in a village called Bossa. Right now there are about 30 children at the orphanage ranging from age 18 months to 12 years old. My ministry description will evolve overtime so that I can learn all of the aspects of what it takes to work in and oversee an orphanage from caring for the kids, to going shopping for the food, to doctoring them up, to tutoring the kids, to teaching them the Bible, to praying with the children, but upon arrival my primary responsibility will be to simply pour my life into loving and caring for the children. For more info about the orphanage you can visit www.gracetaitshelter.com.
So that’s the plan for the next phase of my life: simply to love God more and to love people more. I am so thankful for the opportunity to throw my life away for the Beautiful One. Oh, to lose my life only to find it again in Him! What a gift!
So, to all of you who live in the area I’d like to invite you out to my fundraiser. Obviously, moving half way across the world is quite expensive hehe :) But, my Father is faithful to take care of me so I’m not worried. The event is happening at a coffee shop in Atlanta on Friday March 23rd at 7pm. Email me or comment on this post for more details and I will send you an evite. However, if you can’t make the event, but would still like to sow into what I’m doing you can do so by clicking the donate button to the left.
Most importantly, if you have time to pray for me that would be amazing! Here are some prayer requests I have:
-safety while traveling and especially while living in Cameroon
- protection against diseases (specifically malaria and cholera)
-protection against witchcraft and curses
-more love everyday to pour onto the children
-financial provision (believing for $300 per month)
-wisdom, revelation
-a heart of compassion
-patience
All my love,
Brittanie
Finally I have some time to sit down and blog about this whole moving back to Africa business! Lots of you have been asking me questions. Well, here are all the answers :)
First of all I just want to say a huge THANK YOU SO MUCH to everyone who has been praying for me, helping me with my fundraising, encouraging me, making financial contributions etc. You are so loved and so appreciated! I am such a blessed little woman who loves Jesus :)
So the first step of my next African adventure deeper into Gods heart of love will begin in Pemba, Mozambique. I will be attending a school for missionaries there called Harvest School which is run by Iris Ministries. Here is a little info about what it is from our student manual:
"Harvest school is a school for those who have a clear call to missions. All giftings are welcome and it is definitely not just open for pastors or leaders. It a school to train and equip a new breed of missionaries, a generation of laid down lovers who will run into the darkest corners of the earth, call in the outcasts, bring in His bride and compel the poor to come to the wedding feast.
You can see Jesus in the eyes of the dying, the broken and the lost. He came with ceaseless love for both the one and the masses. Now we must do the same- stop for the one but believe for the multitudes. We are called to carry His glory, but first we must lie down so that whole nations can come to Jesus.
For this purpose, Iris Ministries it thrilled to present our international missions training schools based in the northern province of Mozambique. To come and be trained on the field. Live, love, and learn from the poor."
I am overcome with excitement about the school!! It goes from June 1st- August 9th. I know that it’s going to be such a precious time for me and the Lord. I am praying that He just fills me with more and more of His love for Him which looks like more and more love for my neighbor (my poor neighbor, my unlovely neighbor, my mean neighbor, my sister/neighbor, my mother/father/neighbor, my hungry neighbor, my neighbor who lives on a different continent etc) and then when I leave the school I can just pour all that love He’s given me out on each person I come into contact with, especially the children I will be serving in Cameroon.
That brings us to step two of my journey. After completing the school I will be moving to Cameroon to live a dream God has been burning my heart with for quite a while now. I will be living and working and loving in an orphanage in a village called Bossa. Right now there are about 30 children at the orphanage ranging from age 18 months to 12 years old. My ministry description will evolve overtime so that I can learn all of the aspects of what it takes to work in and oversee an orphanage from caring for the kids, to going shopping for the food, to doctoring them up, to tutoring the kids, to teaching them the Bible, to praying with the children, but upon arrival my primary responsibility will be to simply pour my life into loving and caring for the children. For more info about the orphanage you can visit www.gracetaitshelter.com.
So that’s the plan for the next phase of my life: simply to love God more and to love people more. I am so thankful for the opportunity to throw my life away for the Beautiful One. Oh, to lose my life only to find it again in Him! What a gift!
So, to all of you who live in the area I’d like to invite you out to my fundraiser. Obviously, moving half way across the world is quite expensive hehe :) But, my Father is faithful to take care of me so I’m not worried. The event is happening at a coffee shop in Atlanta on Friday March 23rd at 7pm. Email me or comment on this post for more details and I will send you an evite. However, if you can’t make the event, but would still like to sow into what I’m doing you can do so by clicking the donate button to the left.
Most importantly, if you have time to pray for me that would be amazing! Here are some prayer requests I have:
-safety while traveling and especially while living in Cameroon
- protection against diseases (specifically malaria and cholera)
-protection against witchcraft and curses
-more love everyday to pour onto the children
-financial provision (believing for $300 per month)
-wisdom, revelation
-a heart of compassion
-patience
All my love,
Brittanie
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Yes, it's true, we're off to Cameroon!
Hello friends!
Wow, its been a while! Just wanted to come by and drop a quick note confirming the news that I am indeed moving to Cameroon this August and thank everyone who has already sent in donations and support of all kinds. I couldnt be more grateful or excited for this opportunity. The legistics are still being worked out so I cannot give too many details right now. But more details will follow in the coming weeks as I solidify my plans and make some major decisions regarding what I am going to do there. I am so excited to take another journey deeper into Love with you all and I look forward to sharing with you and reading your comments!
All my love,
Brittanie
Wow, its been a while! Just wanted to come by and drop a quick note confirming the news that I am indeed moving to Cameroon this August and thank everyone who has already sent in donations and support of all kinds. I couldnt be more grateful or excited for this opportunity. The legistics are still being worked out so I cannot give too many details right now. But more details will follow in the coming weeks as I solidify my plans and make some major decisions regarding what I am going to do there. I am so excited to take another journey deeper into Love with you all and I look forward to sharing with you and reading your comments!
All my love,
Brittanie
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Home Sweet Home
Wow, it feels great to be home :)I arrived in South Africa last Friday morning at about 9am. The journey here was very long, but a lot less painful than I anticipated. I was traveling for a total of over thirty hours. I left Atlanta Wednesday afternoon and flew to New York. My flight arrived in La Guardia, but I was flying out of JFK so I had to take a shuttle in between. The shuttle was convenient because it only cost ten dollars and it took you right from one airport to the other, but I was a bit nervous because it was late so I only got to the airport 2 hours before my international flight instead of the 3 hours they recommend. But it was fine, I made it in time and everything. I flew from New York to Zurich, Switzerland. The flight was 7 hours long and it wasn’t bad at all. I sat next to a very nice young woman who was from nearby Switzerland and was going home to visit her long distance boyfriend. We talked for a while and she told me about her life and I told her about mine. Besides that we ate and slept and before I knew it the flight was over. Overnight flights like this one are always easiest for me because I usually sleep the whole time.
We arrived in Zurich at about 10am and I was pretty bummed because it looked like it was raining pretty badly out. My layover was 12 hours long so I was hoping to go out and see some stuff. So my new friend and I decided that it would be best for me to just book one of the day rooms in the airport (they are like little hotel rooms with a bed and shower and stuff in them) for the day instead of going out and exploring the city in the rain. But, praise the Lord the rain stopped! So, although I was very tired I decided to go out and explore Zurich, Switzerland. It was so much fun! There is a train that takes you right into the city from the airport. It only takes ten minutes. It was pretty expensive, but everything is in Europe so I wasn’t really surprised. I just walked around this city for a few hours and I saw such cool things. Just the way it is laid out in general was really awesome to me. The architecture was so grand and everything was artistic and beautiful. I fell in love with the cobblestone streets and all that cozy shops tucked away in bends and curves and pockets of roads. I walked along the lake and watched the boats and the swans. There was so much love there. Everywhere I looked there were couples holding hand and smiling at each other or kissing against the beautiful backdrop of the city. Of course there were lots of Swiss sausages and pretzels and chocolate for sale on food carts on the street. The city had a very romantic feel to it. I went to see three beautiful historic churches there. One had the famous stained glass Chagall windows in it. Oh my, they were so amazing. I could have stared at them for hours. They were huge and each told biblical stories so beautifully with color, glass, and light. I felt as though I was watching a performance of some kind. It was as if the colors had breath in them. They seemed to be alive and moving. And the light shining through them just awaked that thing inside of me that makes me revere God. These stained glass windows and this church really reflected the majesty and beauty of God in a might way. I sat in one of the pews for a while and prayed and just admired God for all that He is.
I also went to the Grossmunster church. It was even more amazing. There more stained glass windows here, but instead of three huge ones that told multiple stories on each like the ones at the church before, Grossmunster had several windows all around the church each one telling a different story. My favorite one was actually just black and white, but it played with the light which was really interesting. All in the space of one window it played with about six different understandings of who Jesus is. That one was very thought provoking. This church also had a tower on top and you could pay to climb to the top of the tower (very long and scary journey up some never-ending staircases) and look over the top of the whole city! I did this of course and it was breath-taking! After that I went back to the airport. I loved Zurich and would really love to spend a summer there sometime.
My next flight was ten hours long, another overnight. Not bad at all. I sat next to another very sweet lady named Helena from the Ukraine. She was a talker! She talked to me for hours. But I was happy because I had asked God when I got on the plane to sit me next to some one really nice who would talk to me, I definitely got that!
I arrived in Johannesburg, South Africa on Friday morning a little after 9am. After I got all my bags and stuff I took the train to Sandton to meet my dear sister in Christ, Masana who was picking me up. I could hardly contain my excitement during the plane ride. Masana is one of my closest and dearest friends in the world, literally. She is a genuine sister of mine and we planned to spend Friday night and Saturday catching up and loving on each other. I couldn’t wait. When I walked out of the train station and finally spotted Masana I just lost it. My heart leaped with joy. I screamed her name and dropped my suitcase in the middle of a Joburg street and ran to here and we hugged each other so tight! We just wept and embraced and praised the Lord for bringing me back home to her. She then took me to her house. She had to work Friday so she picked me up on her lunch break but had to go back after dropping me off. After all of that traveling I was exhausted so I showered, ate, checked the internet, and then took a nice long nap. That night Masana took me out for supper. We had Thai food and great conversation. It was really such a blessing to be in her presence again and just laugh with her and talk about things that only people who have lived here with me in South Africa understand. It was so freeing! We had a great time.
The next day Masana woke me up and told me that we were meeting another one of our sisters, Sara for an event she was having that morning. I thought that sounded a bit strange because I wondered why the “event” would be at 11am, but I just went with it. She told me to make sure to get dressed up, because it is a fancy event so I did. The “event” was in an outdoor area at a huge mall. We arrived and I saw Sara and again got so happy. Sara went the same church as Masana and I and is a part of the same circle of friends. I spent Christmas with Sara and her mom last year. She is an angel, a very dear friend of mine. Anyway, Sara suggests we take a photo so we pose for the photo. After taking the photo Sara begins to ask me, “Is there any gorgeous man you would love to see here?” and before she can finish I look to my left and Joshua is standing there with a bouquet of two dozen red roses. There was no “event” going on. My boyfriend had flown all the way from Cape Town to Johannesburg to surprise me! As soon as I saw him I screamed and ran to him and jumped on him! I was so surprised and soooooo happy to see him after 5 long months of long distance. He was all dressed up and looked so handsome! As we were embracing I remembered why I love this man so much.
Sara and Masana went to the movies to watch a movie while Joshua and I had some time to ourselves. He took me for some lunch and we just talked as I tried to get over the shock of him being there. They really got me good! I was overflowing with joy. We all then went back to Sara’s and hung out for a bit. Strangely enough this was so serial for me because it was as if I never left. As me and my friends and the man that I love were all sitting in the living room just talking and laughing and debating I was overwhelmed by their love for me. It really reinforced the fact that no matter how far away I am and no matter how long I am gone for I will always have a home and a family here, people who truly love and accept me and want to spend time with me. It humbled me so much and just made me so grateful to God. That’s another thing! As we were talking I remembered how much God is the center of everything, every conversation, every joke, every debate, every comment. I just love how my friends are so unashamedly passionately in love with God. God is everything to them. You never have to try not to sound too Christiany or anything when you’re around them, you can just be authentically who you are and you are accepted. Its so beautiful…
After a couple hours Masana had to go because she was leaving on a business trip for China the next day. So we prayed for her and said goodbye. Then Joshua, Sara, and me all went to the shop and bought some stuff for supper. We went back to Sara’s place and made Mexican. We at sat at the table together and ate great food prepared by Sara, drank some South African wine, laughed a lot and just enjoyed each other’s company. It was a great day.
Right now I am on a plane to Cape Town. It’s Monday. Joshua went back this morning so I’m meeting him there. I will be in Cape Town for a few weeks then will head back up to Johannesburg for the mission. I’m super excited for what the rest of this trip has in store! I already am just so thankful to be back and having such a great time!
Love and Light,
Britt
We arrived in Zurich at about 10am and I was pretty bummed because it looked like it was raining pretty badly out. My layover was 12 hours long so I was hoping to go out and see some stuff. So my new friend and I decided that it would be best for me to just book one of the day rooms in the airport (they are like little hotel rooms with a bed and shower and stuff in them) for the day instead of going out and exploring the city in the rain. But, praise the Lord the rain stopped! So, although I was very tired I decided to go out and explore Zurich, Switzerland. It was so much fun! There is a train that takes you right into the city from the airport. It only takes ten minutes. It was pretty expensive, but everything is in Europe so I wasn’t really surprised. I just walked around this city for a few hours and I saw such cool things. Just the way it is laid out in general was really awesome to me. The architecture was so grand and everything was artistic and beautiful. I fell in love with the cobblestone streets and all that cozy shops tucked away in bends and curves and pockets of roads. I walked along the lake and watched the boats and the swans. There was so much love there. Everywhere I looked there were couples holding hand and smiling at each other or kissing against the beautiful backdrop of the city. Of course there were lots of Swiss sausages and pretzels and chocolate for sale on food carts on the street. The city had a very romantic feel to it. I went to see three beautiful historic churches there. One had the famous stained glass Chagall windows in it. Oh my, they were so amazing. I could have stared at them for hours. They were huge and each told biblical stories so beautifully with color, glass, and light. I felt as though I was watching a performance of some kind. It was as if the colors had breath in them. They seemed to be alive and moving. And the light shining through them just awaked that thing inside of me that makes me revere God. These stained glass windows and this church really reflected the majesty and beauty of God in a might way. I sat in one of the pews for a while and prayed and just admired God for all that He is.
I also went to the Grossmunster church. It was even more amazing. There more stained glass windows here, but instead of three huge ones that told multiple stories on each like the ones at the church before, Grossmunster had several windows all around the church each one telling a different story. My favorite one was actually just black and white, but it played with the light which was really interesting. All in the space of one window it played with about six different understandings of who Jesus is. That one was very thought provoking. This church also had a tower on top and you could pay to climb to the top of the tower (very long and scary journey up some never-ending staircases) and look over the top of the whole city! I did this of course and it was breath-taking! After that I went back to the airport. I loved Zurich and would really love to spend a summer there sometime.
My next flight was ten hours long, another overnight. Not bad at all. I sat next to another very sweet lady named Helena from the Ukraine. She was a talker! She talked to me for hours. But I was happy because I had asked God when I got on the plane to sit me next to some one really nice who would talk to me, I definitely got that!
I arrived in Johannesburg, South Africa on Friday morning a little after 9am. After I got all my bags and stuff I took the train to Sandton to meet my dear sister in Christ, Masana who was picking me up. I could hardly contain my excitement during the plane ride. Masana is one of my closest and dearest friends in the world, literally. She is a genuine sister of mine and we planned to spend Friday night and Saturday catching up and loving on each other. I couldn’t wait. When I walked out of the train station and finally spotted Masana I just lost it. My heart leaped with joy. I screamed her name and dropped my suitcase in the middle of a Joburg street and ran to here and we hugged each other so tight! We just wept and embraced and praised the Lord for bringing me back home to her. She then took me to her house. She had to work Friday so she picked me up on her lunch break but had to go back after dropping me off. After all of that traveling I was exhausted so I showered, ate, checked the internet, and then took a nice long nap. That night Masana took me out for supper. We had Thai food and great conversation. It was really such a blessing to be in her presence again and just laugh with her and talk about things that only people who have lived here with me in South Africa understand. It was so freeing! We had a great time.
The next day Masana woke me up and told me that we were meeting another one of our sisters, Sara for an event she was having that morning. I thought that sounded a bit strange because I wondered why the “event” would be at 11am, but I just went with it. She told me to make sure to get dressed up, because it is a fancy event so I did. The “event” was in an outdoor area at a huge mall. We arrived and I saw Sara and again got so happy. Sara went the same church as Masana and I and is a part of the same circle of friends. I spent Christmas with Sara and her mom last year. She is an angel, a very dear friend of mine. Anyway, Sara suggests we take a photo so we pose for the photo. After taking the photo Sara begins to ask me, “Is there any gorgeous man you would love to see here?” and before she can finish I look to my left and Joshua is standing there with a bouquet of two dozen red roses. There was no “event” going on. My boyfriend had flown all the way from Cape Town to Johannesburg to surprise me! As soon as I saw him I screamed and ran to him and jumped on him! I was so surprised and soooooo happy to see him after 5 long months of long distance. He was all dressed up and looked so handsome! As we were embracing I remembered why I love this man so much.
Sara and Masana went to the movies to watch a movie while Joshua and I had some time to ourselves. He took me for some lunch and we just talked as I tried to get over the shock of him being there. They really got me good! I was overflowing with joy. We all then went back to Sara’s and hung out for a bit. Strangely enough this was so serial for me because it was as if I never left. As me and my friends and the man that I love were all sitting in the living room just talking and laughing and debating I was overwhelmed by their love for me. It really reinforced the fact that no matter how far away I am and no matter how long I am gone for I will always have a home and a family here, people who truly love and accept me and want to spend time with me. It humbled me so much and just made me so grateful to God. That’s another thing! As we were talking I remembered how much God is the center of everything, every conversation, every joke, every debate, every comment. I just love how my friends are so unashamedly passionately in love with God. God is everything to them. You never have to try not to sound too Christiany or anything when you’re around them, you can just be authentically who you are and you are accepted. Its so beautiful…
After a couple hours Masana had to go because she was leaving on a business trip for China the next day. So we prayed for her and said goodbye. Then Joshua, Sara, and me all went to the shop and bought some stuff for supper. We went back to Sara’s place and made Mexican. We at sat at the table together and ate great food prepared by Sara, drank some South African wine, laughed a lot and just enjoyed each other’s company. It was a great day.
Right now I am on a plane to Cape Town. It’s Monday. Joshua went back this morning so I’m meeting him there. I will be in Cape Town for a few weeks then will head back up to Johannesburg for the mission. I’m super excited for what the rest of this trip has in store! I already am just so thankful to be back and having such a great time!
Love and Light,
Britt
Thursday, March 17, 2011
When God Says No
I know, I know. This is a fine time for me to blog after not blogging during some of the most important parts of my time in Cape Town. I'm sorry. I really have no excuse for my lack of communication. I guess the more comfortable I got living in Cape Town the less I felt motivated to document what was going on. I apologize. I will do better next time.
I am now in America sitting at my grandfather's house. I was crying out to God about my life and as I was about to get my journal and write I decided that maybe I should put all this on my blog instead so everyone can kind of know whats going on in my life and my heart. So more than a blog entry I guess this is like a journal entry that I am blogging... or something...
Art for Africa was a huge success, glory to God! It was probably the most fun and fulfilling experience of my entire life. The day of the final performance I was in absolute awe as it was everything I had seen in the vision God gave me. It was such a beautiful experience. I still cant believe that I was actually blessed with the opportunity to experience it. I would love to do something like that more permenantly. Like, establish a program like that which could be sustainable because the impact it made on the kids and especially on me was huge and incredible!
The performance was at 5pm on November 15th. After the last line was said and all the bows were taken "Art for Africa" was officially over. It was very wierd for me because my whole life was dedicated to make Art for Africa become a reality for so long. I wanted it so badly and was determined to make it happen, so once it was happening I was in heaven. But, I never thought about what was going to happen after it was over. I just never thought that far ahead. I was actually quite shockingly sad when it finished. I had to go through a little grieving period. "Art for Africa" was such a huge part of my life my life even before it happened. I was preparing for it and dreaming about it for a very long time. It was what I did and what I talked about, then it was over and I had no idea what I was going to do next.
So to make a long story short I had to leave South Africa two months after the project was over because I ran out of money. During my two month vacation of sorts I began job hunting because having a paying job after living in another country for a whole year and working for free is essential! So, after going over all of the facts I decided that the best thing for me to do was to take a teaching job in South Korea. The pay is great. I would not only be able to get back on my feet, but I would also be able able to pay off a big chunk of my student loans if I worked there for a year. It seemed like the perfect opportunity especially since working in Atlanta was basically not an option since I have no car or money to buy one and therefore no way to get back and forth to work. So I figured that working in South Korea would be great financially, fit perfectly into my situation, be really fun, and on top of everything I would get to travel! So I took the job, but all along I had a bit of an uneasy feeling about it, like I just didnt want to go and didnt feel like I was going. For the past couple months I have been preparing for Korea and waiting for all my paperwork for my visa, but 2 weeks ago I really began to feel God tugging on my heart. He knows my heart and he knows that my heart is not in Korea. I was going for all the wrong reasons and hadn't waited for him to tell me weather or not to go, I just made the decision for myself and began making preperations. In the beginning my rationale for not following my heart was that this was something I had to do because of circumstance. It was a sacrifice I had to make because I hadn't made any money last year and because I have student loans to pay. But when God confronted me about it, there was no hiding for me. After a lot of prayer and just seeking God about it, it became resoundingly clear to me that it was not God's will for me to go to South Korea and going would actually just be an act of blatant disobedience and me going back to my control freak,desperate way of living-trying to do everything on my own instead of surrending the path of my life to Yaweh. So about three days ago I made the decision to obey God in this matter and not go to South Korea. It is very scary for me and I am having a really hard time with it. The day after I made the decision all of these doors started opening up for me in South Africa, and it made me very angry and confused. I dont understand why God would even allow these wonderful opportunities to come my way when I absolutely can not afford them. I know that His timing is perfect, but my flesh is screaming "GOD! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I CANNOT AFFORD TO DO ANOTHER PROJECT IN AFRICA RIGHT NOW! I NEED MONEY! I NEED A REAL JOB!" I know its kind of silly for me to yell these things at God who created the universe and time and me and everything else, but I cant help it. After last year I just dont have the faith to believe that I can raise another $10,000 to do another project on Cape Town after having raised all the money I raised last year. I have sucked all of my resources dry when it comes to fundraising.I would much rather just work a job and save money myself and then go back to Africa next year. That way I wouldn't have to ask for donations or spend so many months searching for grants. However, all of that being said I love God more than myself, so I am willing to obey Him and do whatever He tells me to do weather it makes sense to me or not.
So now that I am not going to Korea I am praying about whats next for me. In the meantime I am searching for a job. I would love to be an international flight attendant so that I could travel and see the world, but also be able to fly to Africa for free whenever I want and do short term missions there. I also would also really like to get back into theatre. I've been missing acting lately. So I guess we will see what God says. Please everyone if you have a moment just say a prayer for me. I really want to obey God. That is what I want most. So please just pray that He give me direction and give me grace to follow Him. Also, if it is his will please pray that he open a door for employment for me or provide finances for my next project in South Africa and give me faith to believe it can happen again.
Love and light,
Britt :)
I am now in America sitting at my grandfather's house. I was crying out to God about my life and as I was about to get my journal and write I decided that maybe I should put all this on my blog instead so everyone can kind of know whats going on in my life and my heart. So more than a blog entry I guess this is like a journal entry that I am blogging... or something...
Art for Africa was a huge success, glory to God! It was probably the most fun and fulfilling experience of my entire life. The day of the final performance I was in absolute awe as it was everything I had seen in the vision God gave me. It was such a beautiful experience. I still cant believe that I was actually blessed with the opportunity to experience it. I would love to do something like that more permenantly. Like, establish a program like that which could be sustainable because the impact it made on the kids and especially on me was huge and incredible!
The performance was at 5pm on November 15th. After the last line was said and all the bows were taken "Art for Africa" was officially over. It was very wierd for me because my whole life was dedicated to make Art for Africa become a reality for so long. I wanted it so badly and was determined to make it happen, so once it was happening I was in heaven. But, I never thought about what was going to happen after it was over. I just never thought that far ahead. I was actually quite shockingly sad when it finished. I had to go through a little grieving period. "Art for Africa" was such a huge part of my life my life even before it happened. I was preparing for it and dreaming about it for a very long time. It was what I did and what I talked about, then it was over and I had no idea what I was going to do next.
So to make a long story short I had to leave South Africa two months after the project was over because I ran out of money. During my two month vacation of sorts I began job hunting because having a paying job after living in another country for a whole year and working for free is essential! So, after going over all of the facts I decided that the best thing for me to do was to take a teaching job in South Korea. The pay is great. I would not only be able to get back on my feet, but I would also be able able to pay off a big chunk of my student loans if I worked there for a year. It seemed like the perfect opportunity especially since working in Atlanta was basically not an option since I have no car or money to buy one and therefore no way to get back and forth to work. So I figured that working in South Korea would be great financially, fit perfectly into my situation, be really fun, and on top of everything I would get to travel! So I took the job, but all along I had a bit of an uneasy feeling about it, like I just didnt want to go and didnt feel like I was going. For the past couple months I have been preparing for Korea and waiting for all my paperwork for my visa, but 2 weeks ago I really began to feel God tugging on my heart. He knows my heart and he knows that my heart is not in Korea. I was going for all the wrong reasons and hadn't waited for him to tell me weather or not to go, I just made the decision for myself and began making preperations. In the beginning my rationale for not following my heart was that this was something I had to do because of circumstance. It was a sacrifice I had to make because I hadn't made any money last year and because I have student loans to pay. But when God confronted me about it, there was no hiding for me. After a lot of prayer and just seeking God about it, it became resoundingly clear to me that it was not God's will for me to go to South Korea and going would actually just be an act of blatant disobedience and me going back to my control freak,desperate way of living-trying to do everything on my own instead of surrending the path of my life to Yaweh. So about three days ago I made the decision to obey God in this matter and not go to South Korea. It is very scary for me and I am having a really hard time with it. The day after I made the decision all of these doors started opening up for me in South Africa, and it made me very angry and confused. I dont understand why God would even allow these wonderful opportunities to come my way when I absolutely can not afford them. I know that His timing is perfect, but my flesh is screaming "GOD! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I CANNOT AFFORD TO DO ANOTHER PROJECT IN AFRICA RIGHT NOW! I NEED MONEY! I NEED A REAL JOB!" I know its kind of silly for me to yell these things at God who created the universe and time and me and everything else, but I cant help it. After last year I just dont have the faith to believe that I can raise another $10,000 to do another project on Cape Town after having raised all the money I raised last year. I have sucked all of my resources dry when it comes to fundraising.I would much rather just work a job and save money myself and then go back to Africa next year. That way I wouldn't have to ask for donations or spend so many months searching for grants. However, all of that being said I love God more than myself, so I am willing to obey Him and do whatever He tells me to do weather it makes sense to me or not.
So now that I am not going to Korea I am praying about whats next for me. In the meantime I am searching for a job. I would love to be an international flight attendant so that I could travel and see the world, but also be able to fly to Africa for free whenever I want and do short term missions there. I also would also really like to get back into theatre. I've been missing acting lately. So I guess we will see what God says. Please everyone if you have a moment just say a prayer for me. I really want to obey God. That is what I want most. So please just pray that He give me direction and give me grace to follow Him. Also, if it is his will please pray that he open a door for employment for me or provide finances for my next project in South Africa and give me faith to believe it can happen again.
Love and light,
Britt :)
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Children with the Heart of God
Today was an absolutely amazing day at work. To give you some back story, I have been feeling kind of restless about my work lately. Initially I was having a lot of trouble with the school because the sports coaches kept pulling my kids out for practices during drama class time. After weeks and weeks of trying to reach a fair compromise with Mr. Maquina (the head of sports) it came to a point where I had to make the children choose between sports and drama. I didn’t want to do that because it meant so much to the school administration that the students could do both, but having class became impossible. Every day it was something different. I was always missing at least half of my class because of some sports practice or event. So after a week of what felt like pulling teeth I finally got everyone together for a meeting. One Friday afternoon the 2 women that help me (Nonyomeko and Natalie), Mr. Maquina, myself and all the sports coaches had a meeting in which we reached a compromise: the children would have drama class on Mondays, Tuesday s and Saturday s and they would have sports activities the other four days of the week. Although I was sad to lose so much time with them I understood that it was only fair because drama and sports are equally beneficial and important.
As I expected, even the first day of the new schedule my class time was infringed upon for an impromptu soccer event. The next day was the same thing. So I put my foot down and in front of Mr. Maquina and the principal of the school explained to the children that they had to choose one or the other because of scheduling conflicts. I explained to them the importance of both drama and sports and made sure they understood that they should choose based on their own passion for each subject and not based on the teachers or pressure given from either side. After this tearful explanation and what I thought would be my final class because all of my students would leave drama where I’m so hard on them and expectations are so high for sports where they get to run and jump around and be carefree children. But to my surprise only one child left drama for sports and after being away for maybe twenty minutes he came back and said he’d made a mistake and he wanted to stay in drama class. He said he’d only chosen sports so that Mr. Maquina wouldn’t be angry with him. Because of all if this Mr. Maquina was extremely angry with me and told me never to ask him for anything ever again. But, if I didn’t make this executive decision the coaches would have just continued walking all over me and disrespecting my time and my class so I’d rather just bite the bullet and endure his anger.
But coincidentally the week after all of this occurred the teachers decided to go on strike. They’ve been on strike for two and a half weeks and its going to last an additional three weeks after which is spring break. In a nutshell my students are unfairly missing out on two whole months of seventh grade which is going to hinder them so greatly next year when they enter into high school (which begins with 8th grade here). I don’t understand how no one else here sees how huge of a problem this is… I think it’s absolutely absurd. Since the schools are closed we once again had to begin having class outside which is really difficult with the stuff we’re working on now. Also we only have a very small portion of our students because we have no way of communicating with the kids (except squeezing our huge car through the tiny roads in the township looking for kids to shout information to out of our car window that only works when it feels like it) to tell them that we are not striking like the rest of the teachers. So after a couple weeks of feeling really discouraged and almost getting to the point where I’d decided to just prematurely end the project before it began to fizzle away I talked to the Lord about it and He told me to persevere, which I did! And today I received my reward!
I have officially rented out a hall to hold our class in! It’s beautiful and so affordable- only R43 (about $6) per hour. I love it soooo much! It’s like a theatre with a stage and everything! It’s literally exactly what I envisioned when I thought this project up. It’s pretty much exactly like Lang Carson which is the hall we used to have YEA rehearsals in. The kids’ faces when they walked in were priceless! It made all the stress and money absolutely worth it! They were so pumped! We were in there for the first time today. My class has dwindled from the original 60 down to 42 this semester which is a much more manageable and enjoyable number. But because of the strike and lack of communication over the next few weeks its just 10 kids, Natalie, Nonyameko and myself so it’s very intimate.
Today was so amazing because we had what Freddie used to call a “round table” session. We sat our chairs in a circle and we had a deep conversation which is the seed for our next project. We base the play off of things that come out during the round table session. We interviewed each child about him/her self and the things that came out of their mouths were amazing/awful/inspirational/unbelievable/detestable/artistic/raw/beautiful/unmentionable- the perfect ingredients for one hell of a play! We only had time for eight interviews but here are the highlights from a few:
Masixole- 14 year old boy:
He said that the two things he loves most in this world are God and people. That was so beautiful to me because Jesus commands us to firstly love God with all of our hearts, souls and minds and secondly love our neighbor as ourselves (Matt 22:37-39). Therefore Masixole at the age of 14 just naturally has the heart of Jesus. He went on to tell me about how he wants to be a preacher. But it doesn’t stop there. He has started his own church branch with some youth from his home church and he is the pastor! This child really loves the Lord, its amazing! He talked about how his mother whom he loves very much is not a Christian. He prays for her to come to God everyday and he really believes that God is going to answer that prayer someday soon. His mother is a widow of two years. His father died from an “unknown disease” two years ago. He misses his father very much, but his mother is a great stand in. He says, “When I need a father she is a father to me. When I need a mother she is my mother.” His ultimate goal in life is to please God and become a great man.
Esethu-12 year old girl:
She began by saying, “I am who I am and I am what I am”. I’m not really sure what she meant by that, but I found it intriguing. She wants to be a judge so that she can stop sexual abuse of children. She told us the story of a young girl in her family that was raped at a very young age by a neighbor. She talked about how the girl totally changed after that. She was such a sad and closed child, her innocence was totally gone. It really affected Esethu and gave her a heart for young girls who are raped. She said that when she is a judge she will put all the abusers in jail. When I asked her if she had any final comments she wanted to make to the world she said she wanted to tell her country that they must be strong. That’s Esethu for you- my little activist.
Elihle- 13 year old girl
Elihle is stunningly beautiful. It’s the first and most noticeable thing about her. She is outwardly beautiful and she also has this inner beauty that radiates from inside her. It’s so huge, inescapable really. I asked her if she knows how beautiful she is and she replied with the most humble but confident and adorable “yes”. She said she is beautiful because she tells herself that she’s beautiful and her mother tells her that she is beautiful then she smiled that sunshine smile of hers. When I asked her to describe her house she described a little orange house with one bedroom, a kitchen, a toilet, and a dining room that sits in the middle of a huge crime zone but according to her is a little abode of safety. She said that when she is at home she feels absolutely happy and safe but when she steps outdoors is when she starts to feel afraid. Afraid of what? “The many people that are raping us and the criminals and the guns”. Elihle’s favorite memory is her grandmother’s 60th birthday. She loved it so much because her gogo looked so happy and was smiling a lot and because her family was all around. She ended with her signature smile that pulls a bit to the right and only shows her teeth at the very end.
Thandile- 14 year old girl
Thandile’s story was very inspirational. It’s really a story of faith. She told us about her parents’ divorce which happened years and years ago. They divorced because her mother got pregnant by a white man that lives in the town. They are now in a relationship and Thandile says the man is very nice, but her deepest yearning is for her parents to love each other again. Her father told her that because of the white man he doesn’t love her mother anymore, but Thandile prays every night for them to get back together. She lives in Cape Town with her father, and her mother and the other children live in a rural area in the Eastern Cape. Because her father is a single parent Thandile is frequently left home alone. One day she was awakened by the sound of an intruder and she was alone in the house. She tried to hide, but the man found her. She said in that moment she was very scared so she prayed. She asked God to come down and wrap her up in his wings and told him that if it was his will for her to be raped at this time then let his will be done, but if it wasn’t then may he rescue her which thank God he did. “Not my will, but thy will be done”(Matt 26:39): another child with the heart of Jesus. Wow.
Linda- 14 year old girl:
Linda began by telling us how much of a positive impact drama class is having on her life. She is staying off the streets and focused on what she’s learning. She is no longer getting into fights or hanging with the wrong crowd. Her family is very proud of her. But the story she told us after that was absolutely heart breaking. Linda has a problem with food. Everyone knows it; it what she’s known for. She’s overweight and she’s a bully, loves punking smaller children into giving her their food. But Linda’s food problem is not one simply of malice. She finds something in food that she can’t find anywhere else: love. Linda’s first time having sex was last year. She went with some of her older friends to a man’s house who gave them beer, meat, and candy in exchange for her virginity which she felt was a fair trade. He also offered them R200 (about $28) for each “round”, but Linda explained that she didn’t care about the money she just wanted the food. As she told the story she giggled to try and cover up the pain, but it wasn’t long before the tears she was desperately trying to hold back began to gloss over her eyes. For the first time since I’ve known her I was able to see through Linda’s tough-girl façade to the softer her, the hurting her, the ruined her. Thankfully her HIV test came out negative and her “sugar daddy” was put in jail, but it’s not long before that hunger she tries to satisfy with food becomes uncontrollable again. How low will she stoop next time? When will someone step in and address the actual problem instead of the effects of the problem? Where will Linda be five years from now?
These are only a few of the stories, but as you can see there is so much there. There is no need for me to have them make up stories when their own are so interesting! I must say that many of the stories made me very sad, but more than that they made me happy because the kids are opening their mouths and saying telling them; that’s the first step. I feel like these stories are the beginning of the end of child rape, child prostitution, HIV, crime and much more. I’m so happy these few pre-teens after less than a year of drama class are beginning to tear down the walls of fear and use their voices as their weapons. It’s very inspiring. After class I treated them to dinner at Spur which is like the Applebee’s of South Africa. We had a really wonderful time, lots of smiles and laughter and love. And love is the ultimate goal after all isn’t it? <3
As I expected, even the first day of the new schedule my class time was infringed upon for an impromptu soccer event. The next day was the same thing. So I put my foot down and in front of Mr. Maquina and the principal of the school explained to the children that they had to choose one or the other because of scheduling conflicts. I explained to them the importance of both drama and sports and made sure they understood that they should choose based on their own passion for each subject and not based on the teachers or pressure given from either side. After this tearful explanation and what I thought would be my final class because all of my students would leave drama where I’m so hard on them and expectations are so high for sports where they get to run and jump around and be carefree children. But to my surprise only one child left drama for sports and after being away for maybe twenty minutes he came back and said he’d made a mistake and he wanted to stay in drama class. He said he’d only chosen sports so that Mr. Maquina wouldn’t be angry with him. Because of all if this Mr. Maquina was extremely angry with me and told me never to ask him for anything ever again. But, if I didn’t make this executive decision the coaches would have just continued walking all over me and disrespecting my time and my class so I’d rather just bite the bullet and endure his anger.
But coincidentally the week after all of this occurred the teachers decided to go on strike. They’ve been on strike for two and a half weeks and its going to last an additional three weeks after which is spring break. In a nutshell my students are unfairly missing out on two whole months of seventh grade which is going to hinder them so greatly next year when they enter into high school (which begins with 8th grade here). I don’t understand how no one else here sees how huge of a problem this is… I think it’s absolutely absurd. Since the schools are closed we once again had to begin having class outside which is really difficult with the stuff we’re working on now. Also we only have a very small portion of our students because we have no way of communicating with the kids (except squeezing our huge car through the tiny roads in the township looking for kids to shout information to out of our car window that only works when it feels like it) to tell them that we are not striking like the rest of the teachers. So after a couple weeks of feeling really discouraged and almost getting to the point where I’d decided to just prematurely end the project before it began to fizzle away I talked to the Lord about it and He told me to persevere, which I did! And today I received my reward!
I have officially rented out a hall to hold our class in! It’s beautiful and so affordable- only R43 (about $6) per hour. I love it soooo much! It’s like a theatre with a stage and everything! It’s literally exactly what I envisioned when I thought this project up. It’s pretty much exactly like Lang Carson which is the hall we used to have YEA rehearsals in. The kids’ faces when they walked in were priceless! It made all the stress and money absolutely worth it! They were so pumped! We were in there for the first time today. My class has dwindled from the original 60 down to 42 this semester which is a much more manageable and enjoyable number. But because of the strike and lack of communication over the next few weeks its just 10 kids, Natalie, Nonyameko and myself so it’s very intimate.
Today was so amazing because we had what Freddie used to call a “round table” session. We sat our chairs in a circle and we had a deep conversation which is the seed for our next project. We base the play off of things that come out during the round table session. We interviewed each child about him/her self and the things that came out of their mouths were amazing/awful/inspirational/unbelievable/detestable/artistic/raw/beautiful/unmentionable- the perfect ingredients for one hell of a play! We only had time for eight interviews but here are the highlights from a few:
Masixole- 14 year old boy:
He said that the two things he loves most in this world are God and people. That was so beautiful to me because Jesus commands us to firstly love God with all of our hearts, souls and minds and secondly love our neighbor as ourselves (Matt 22:37-39). Therefore Masixole at the age of 14 just naturally has the heart of Jesus. He went on to tell me about how he wants to be a preacher. But it doesn’t stop there. He has started his own church branch with some youth from his home church and he is the pastor! This child really loves the Lord, its amazing! He talked about how his mother whom he loves very much is not a Christian. He prays for her to come to God everyday and he really believes that God is going to answer that prayer someday soon. His mother is a widow of two years. His father died from an “unknown disease” two years ago. He misses his father very much, but his mother is a great stand in. He says, “When I need a father she is a father to me. When I need a mother she is my mother.” His ultimate goal in life is to please God and become a great man.
Esethu-12 year old girl:
She began by saying, “I am who I am and I am what I am”. I’m not really sure what she meant by that, but I found it intriguing. She wants to be a judge so that she can stop sexual abuse of children. She told us the story of a young girl in her family that was raped at a very young age by a neighbor. She talked about how the girl totally changed after that. She was such a sad and closed child, her innocence was totally gone. It really affected Esethu and gave her a heart for young girls who are raped. She said that when she is a judge she will put all the abusers in jail. When I asked her if she had any final comments she wanted to make to the world she said she wanted to tell her country that they must be strong. That’s Esethu for you- my little activist.
Elihle- 13 year old girl
Elihle is stunningly beautiful. It’s the first and most noticeable thing about her. She is outwardly beautiful and she also has this inner beauty that radiates from inside her. It’s so huge, inescapable really. I asked her if she knows how beautiful she is and she replied with the most humble but confident and adorable “yes”. She said she is beautiful because she tells herself that she’s beautiful and her mother tells her that she is beautiful then she smiled that sunshine smile of hers. When I asked her to describe her house she described a little orange house with one bedroom, a kitchen, a toilet, and a dining room that sits in the middle of a huge crime zone but according to her is a little abode of safety. She said that when she is at home she feels absolutely happy and safe but when she steps outdoors is when she starts to feel afraid. Afraid of what? “The many people that are raping us and the criminals and the guns”. Elihle’s favorite memory is her grandmother’s 60th birthday. She loved it so much because her gogo looked so happy and was smiling a lot and because her family was all around. She ended with her signature smile that pulls a bit to the right and only shows her teeth at the very end.
Thandile- 14 year old girl
Thandile’s story was very inspirational. It’s really a story of faith. She told us about her parents’ divorce which happened years and years ago. They divorced because her mother got pregnant by a white man that lives in the town. They are now in a relationship and Thandile says the man is very nice, but her deepest yearning is for her parents to love each other again. Her father told her that because of the white man he doesn’t love her mother anymore, but Thandile prays every night for them to get back together. She lives in Cape Town with her father, and her mother and the other children live in a rural area in the Eastern Cape. Because her father is a single parent Thandile is frequently left home alone. One day she was awakened by the sound of an intruder and she was alone in the house. She tried to hide, but the man found her. She said in that moment she was very scared so she prayed. She asked God to come down and wrap her up in his wings and told him that if it was his will for her to be raped at this time then let his will be done, but if it wasn’t then may he rescue her which thank God he did. “Not my will, but thy will be done”(Matt 26:39): another child with the heart of Jesus. Wow.
Linda- 14 year old girl:
Linda began by telling us how much of a positive impact drama class is having on her life. She is staying off the streets and focused on what she’s learning. She is no longer getting into fights or hanging with the wrong crowd. Her family is very proud of her. But the story she told us after that was absolutely heart breaking. Linda has a problem with food. Everyone knows it; it what she’s known for. She’s overweight and she’s a bully, loves punking smaller children into giving her their food. But Linda’s food problem is not one simply of malice. She finds something in food that she can’t find anywhere else: love. Linda’s first time having sex was last year. She went with some of her older friends to a man’s house who gave them beer, meat, and candy in exchange for her virginity which she felt was a fair trade. He also offered them R200 (about $28) for each “round”, but Linda explained that she didn’t care about the money she just wanted the food. As she told the story she giggled to try and cover up the pain, but it wasn’t long before the tears she was desperately trying to hold back began to gloss over her eyes. For the first time since I’ve known her I was able to see through Linda’s tough-girl façade to the softer her, the hurting her, the ruined her. Thankfully her HIV test came out negative and her “sugar daddy” was put in jail, but it’s not long before that hunger she tries to satisfy with food becomes uncontrollable again. How low will she stoop next time? When will someone step in and address the actual problem instead of the effects of the problem? Where will Linda be five years from now?
These are only a few of the stories, but as you can see there is so much there. There is no need for me to have them make up stories when their own are so interesting! I must say that many of the stories made me very sad, but more than that they made me happy because the kids are opening their mouths and saying telling them; that’s the first step. I feel like these stories are the beginning of the end of child rape, child prostitution, HIV, crime and much more. I’m so happy these few pre-teens after less than a year of drama class are beginning to tear down the walls of fear and use their voices as their weapons. It’s very inspiring. After class I treated them to dinner at Spur which is like the Applebee’s of South Africa. We had a really wonderful time, lots of smiles and laughter and love. And love is the ultimate goal after all isn’t it? <3
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)